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These are the usual words you will associate me with. Provided you know me.
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Thursday, July 17, 2008

words, words

7/17/2008 05:43:00 PM

11 July 2008 8.07 a.m.

I was nervous. She was nervous.

You've got to admit she looks good. Stunning, I'd say.

No, I don't look as good.

As students from the Secondary section filled the hall, our heartbeats went into gear eight. Yes, gear eight. Although on the outside I was calm and collected, I was hoping on the inside I didn't mess it up for both of us.

Shaking hands, passing 'good luck's around, we struggled to keep a cool head. I forgot who started it, but we held hands. It really helped. She made me feel like Kid, not Chia Hoong, who's gonna go onstage later on. It gave me confidence and warmth, priceless.

Looking at the excellent performers who were before us, naturally we hoped we'd do as well. As the emcees announced our names, a drop of sweat rolled down my cheek.

Vertigo. This is what I felt when I went on stage. "Holy shit, 5sc1 made a huge banner for us." That's the first thing I saw.

Thanks, Sonia, you've helped make my day unforgettable.

And thanks to the rest of 5sc1, who supported us all the way, even if they were standing right at the back of the hall. Yee Jean was practically hollering her throat out.

Once the music started, our nervousness were forgotten, replaced by a rush of adrenaline. Her smile throughout the performance was a stimulant to me; I no longer have the plank pose.

After the performance, we waited for the verdict. Lilian didn't mind not winning, but I thought otherwise. She worked so hard, if we didn't win, I wouldn't feel right. But well, there's always a slip between the mouth and the teacup, Isabell and Hera won. They were really good, my respects and salutes.

For me, I hate failing. Strangely I didn't feel disappointed, more of satisfaction. Most of all, I felt a deep sense of loss.

Thanks Lilian, you've given me the moment of my life by agreeing to be my duet partner. She's really great to work with, Lilian, it's really too bad, it's really too bad. I really will miss the time we worked so hard, practiced after school, memorized the lyrics, the steps. Thanks, Lilian, for putting up with me, I never could sing very well. Never, never will this memory leave my brain, even under the influence of the Alzheimer's disease. I lost warmth.